Mediating Contentious Alimony Cases

Mediating Contentious Alimony Cases

Spousal support cases are some of the most bitter cases where the parties have often dug in their heels to completely opposite positions.  Spouses on both side of the issue may feel strong emotions such as mistrust, anger, abandonment, outrage and exploitation.

Effectively mediating such cases takes a great deal of patience and sensitivity as the mediator navigates the narrow path to finding a solution that both parties will be satisfied with without feeling taken advantage of.

In most states, there are no hard and fast rules as to the amount or duration of alimony payments.  Many courts treat the issue of alimony as a discretionary one in which they decide what is fair under the particular circumstances after weighing a number of factors, including the length of the marriage, the contributions of the spouses during the marriage and the earning capacity of the spouses.  The courts are often tasked with the difficulty of determining how to keep both spouses in the approximate standard of living that they enjoyed during the marriage after they are no longer together.  A skilled mediator can explain that many spouses have financial interdependence during a marriage and that it will take some time to unravel this so that the spouses can eventually both secure financial independence.  The key question is how spousal support can eventually lead to this possibility.

Because there are typically no hard and fast rules regarding the order of spousal support, the mediator can use this ambiguity to assist with mediation.  He or she can explain to each party independently what the court might order in the worst case scenario and potentially cite to a specific case where that is exactly what happened.  Fueled with this information, the parties may be more inclined to settle their spousal support case on their own terms rather than leaving the decision to be made in an unpredictable fashion.

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MEDIATOR OF THE MONTH: Jeffrey Grayson
Mediating Contentious Alimony Cases